"Better than expected might be the level of quality that's necessary to succeed.Of course, once that becomes the standard, the expectation is reset."

Thus, it is imperative to know that expectation may and certainly will kill us, especially for student with too much dose of eagerness. The best way is to adjust the boss' expectation to be lower than what we are capable of delivering (but not too low please, we all need respect and somehow satisfy our self esteem anyway). I know we are all smart and good people. But those things won't bring us far.

"Moderation is the key". Maybe that is just what's best for graduate students. Manage expectation, not only ours, but also other people's. Those higher than us in status in particular, to our advantage. Yes, for our sanity and our worth saving youth.

Resolutions of the day

Gua sering berprinsip segala sesuatu itu lebih cepat selesai akan lebih baik, namun selalu ada pengecualian untuk segala hal. Untuk hal-hal tertentu, LEBIH DITUNDA LEBIH BAIK lho.

Gua nggak pernah sadar kalau pengertian kami tentang “absurd” itu berbeda, jadi gua akan melakukan SEMUA yang dia suruh.

Gua nggak mau peduli kalau dia nggak punya pendirian dan kata2nya nggak bias dipegang, sehingga resolusi di atas nggak akan menjamin keselamatan gua, tapi kalau hal itu terjadi, gua akan TETAP DIAM.

Gua sadar akan hobinya menyindir ornag dengan sinis dan kalau itu terjadi gua TIDAK AKAN BEREAKSI.

Terakhir, thesis gua sudah disubmit sehingga gua sebaiknya berhenti bersikap seperti gua adalah muridnya.

AYS
~kedinginan~

Oknum R: Princess Rapunzel is such a PhD-material.

ehemm...ehemmm... Yeap..just another PhD student disguised as master student. "Oknum R" is what we shall refer him as here. Sensational as usual. Lovely. Thank you Oknum R. :D

7 AM, the usual morning lineup Start on the chores .. and by then it's like 7:15 And so I'll read a book Or maybe two or three .. and basically Just wonder when will my life begin? .. And I'll reread the books If I have time to spare .. Stuck in the same place And I'll keep wanderin' and wanderin' And wanderin' and wonderin' WHEN WILL MY LIFE BEGIN.


Substitute... with....


chores....washing bottles and preparing samples
book/books....paper/papers
same place....lab or office, what else? duh..


Before dating Rapunzel, am so gonna lecture her on CFA stuffs. 

The disposable academic

Why doing a PhD is often a waste of time

Doctoral degrees

Dec 16th 2010 | from PRINT EDITIO

ON THE evening before All Saints’ Day in 1517, Martin Luther nailed 95 theses to the door of a church in Wittenberg. In those days a thesis was simply a position one wanted to argue. Luther, an Augustinian friar, asserted that Christians could not buy their way to heaven. Today a doctoral thesis is both an idea and an account of a period of original research. Writing one is the aim of the hundreds of thousands of students who embark on a doctorate of philosophy (PhD) every year.

In most countries a PhD is a basic requirement for a career in academia. It is an introduction to the world of independent research—a kind of intellectual masterpiece, created by an apprentice in close collaboration with a supervisor. The requirements to complete one vary enormously between countries, universities and even subjects. Some students will first have to spend two years working on a master’s degree or diploma. Some will receive a stipend; others will pay their own way. Some PhDs involve only research, some require classes and examinations and some require the student to teach undergraduates. A thesis can be dozens of pages in mathematics, or many hundreds in history. As a result, newly minted PhDs can be as young as their early 20s or world-weary forty-somethings.

One thing many PhD students have in common is dissatisfaction. Some describe their work as “slave labour”. Seven-day weeks, ten-hour days, low pay and uncertain prospects are widespread. You know you are a graduate student, goes one quip, when your office is better decorated than your home and you have a favourite flavour of instant noodle. “It isn’t graduate school itself that is discouraging,” says one student, who confesses to rather enjoying the hunt for free pizza. “What’s discouraging is realising the end point has been yanked out of reach.”

Whining PhD students are nothing new, but there seem to be genuine problems with the system that produces research doctorates (the practical “professional doctorates” in fields such as law, business and medicine have a more obvious value). There is an oversupply of PhDs. Although a doctorate is designed as training for a job in academia, the number of PhD positions is unrelated to the number of job openings. Meanwhile, business leaders complain about shortages of high-level skills, suggesting PhDs are not teaching the right things. The fiercest critics compare research doctorates to Ponzi or pyramid schemes.

Rich pickings
For most of history even a first degree at a university was the privilege of a rich few, and many academic staff did not hold doctorates. But as higher education expanded after the second world war, so did the expectation that lecturers would hold advanced degrees. American universities geared up first: by 1970 America was producing just under a third of the world’s university students and half of its science and technology PhDs (at that time it had only 6% of the global population). Since then America’s annual output of PhDs has doubled, to 64,000.

Other countries are catching up. Between 1998 and 2006 the number of doctorates handed out in all OECD countries grew by 40%, compared with 22% for America. PhD production sped up most dramatically in Mexico, Portugal, Italy and Slovakia. Even Japan, where the number of young people is shrinking, churned out about 46% more PhDs. Part of that growth reflects the expansion of university education outside America. Richard Freeman, a labour economist at Harvard University, says that by 2006 America was enrolling just 12% of the world’s students.

But universities have discovered that PhD students are cheap, highly motivated and disposable labour. With more PhD students they can do more research, and in some countries more teaching, with less money. A graduate assistant at Yale might earn $20,000 a year for nine months of teaching. The average pay of full professors in America was $109,000 in 2009—higher than the average for judges and magistrates.

Indeed, the production of PhDs has far outstripped demand for university lecturers. In a recent book, Andrew Hacker and Claudia Dreifus, an academic and a journalist, report that America produced more than 100,000 doctoral degrees between 2005 and 2009. In the same period there were just 16,000 new professorships. Using PhD students to do much of the undergraduate teaching cuts the number of full-time jobs. Even in Canada, where the output of PhD graduates has grown relatively modestly, universities conferred 4,800 doctorate degrees in 2007 but hired just 2,616 new full-time professors. Only a few fast-developing countries, such as Brazil and China, now seem short of PhDs.

A short course in supply and demand
In research the story is similar. PhD students and contract staff known as “postdocs”, described by one student as “the ugly underbelly of academia”, do much of the research these days. There is a glut of postdocs too. Dr Freeman concluded from pre-2000 data that if American faculty jobs in the life sciences were increasing at 5% a year, just 20% of students would land one. In Canada 80% of postdocs earn $38,600 or less per year before tax—the average salary of a construction worker. The rise of the postdoc has created another obstacle on the way to an academic post. In some areas five years as a postdoc is now a prerequisite for landing a secure full-time job.

These armies of low-paid PhD researchers and postdocs boost universities’, and therefore countries’, research capacity. Yet that is not always a good thing. Brilliant, well-trained minds can go to waste when fashions change. The post-Sputnik era drove the rapid growth in PhD physicists that came to an abrupt halt as the Vietnam war drained the science budget. Brian Schwartz, a professor of physics at the City University of New York, says that in the 1970s as many as 5,000 physicists had to find jobs in other areas.

In America the rise of PhD teachers’ unions reflects the breakdown of an implicit contract between universities and PhD students: crummy pay now for a good academic job later. Student teachers in public universities such as the University of Wisconsin-Madison formed unions as early as the 1960s, but the pace of unionisation has increased recently. Unions are now spreading to private universities; though Yale and Cornell, where university administrators and some faculty argue that PhD students who teach are not workers but apprentices, have resisted union drives. In 2002 New York University was the first private university to recognise a PhD teachers’ union, but stopped negotiating with it three years later.

In some countries, such as Britain and America, poor pay and job prospects are reflected in the number of foreign-born PhD students. Dr Freeman estimates that in 1966 only 23% of science and engineering PhDs in America were awarded to students born outside the country. By 2006 that proportion had increased to 48%. Foreign students tend to tolerate poorer working conditions, and the supply of cheap, brilliant, foreign labour also keeps wages down.

A PhD may offer no financial benefit over a master’s degree. It can even reduce earnings

Proponents of the PhD argue that it is worthwhile even if it does not lead to permanent academic employment. Not every student embarks on a PhD wanting a university career and many move successfully into private-sector jobs in, for instance, industrial research. That is true; but drop-out rates suggest that many students become dispirited. In America only 57% of doctoral students will have a PhD ten years after their first date of enrolment. In the humanities, where most students pay for their own PhDs, the figure is 49%. Worse still, whereas in other subject areas students tend to jump ship in the early years, in the humanities they cling like limpets before eventually falling off. And these students started out as the academic cream of the nation. Research at one American university found that those who finish are no cleverer than those who do not. Poor supervision, bad job prospects or lack of money cause them to run out of steam.

Even graduates who find work outside universities may not fare all that well. PhD courses are so specialised that university careers offices struggle to assist graduates looking for jobs, and supervisors tend to have little interest in students who are leaving academia. One OECD study shows that five years after receiving their degrees, more than 60% of PhDs in Slovakia and more than 45% in Belgium, the Czech Republic, Germany and Spain were still on temporary contracts. Many were postdocs. About one-third of Austria’s PhD graduates take jobs unrelated to their degrees. In Germany 13% of all PhD graduates end up in lowly occupations. In the Netherlands the proportion is 21%.

A very slim premium

PhD graduates do at least earn more than those with a bachelor’s degree. A study in the Journal of Higher Education Policy and Management by Bernard Casey shows that British men with a bachelor’s degree earn 14% more than those who could have gone to university but chose not to. The earnings premium for a PhD is 26%. But the premium for a master’s degree, which can be accomplished in as little as one year, is almost as high, at 23%. In some subjects the premium for a PhD vanishes entirely. PhDs in maths and computing, social sciences and languages earn no more than those with master’s degrees. The premium for a PhD is actually smaller than for a master’s degree in engineering and technology, architecture and education. Only in medicine, other sciences, and business and financial studies is it high enough to be worthwhile. Over all subjects, a PhD commands only a 3% premium over a master’s degree.

Dr Schwartz, the New York physicist, says the skills learned in the course of a PhD can be readily acquired through much shorter courses. Thirty years ago, he says, Wall Street firms realised that some physicists could work out differential equations and recruited them to become “quants”, analysts and traders. Today several short courses offer the advanced maths useful for finance. “A PhD physicist with one course on differential equations is not competitive,” says Dr Schwartz.

Many students say they are pursuing their subject out of love, and that education is an end in itself. Some give little thought to where the qualification might lead. In one study of British PhD graduates, about a third admitted that they were doing their doctorate partly to go on being a student, or put off job hunting. Nearly half of engineering students admitted to this. Scientists can easily get stipends, and therefore drift into doing a PhD. But there are penalties, as well as benefits, to staying at university. Workers with “surplus schooling”—more education than a job requires—are likely to be less satisfied, less productive and more likely to say they are going to leave their jobs.

The interests of universities and tenured academics are misaligned with those of PhD students

Academics tend to regard asking whether a PhD is worthwhile as analogous to wondering whether there is too much art or culture in the world. They believe that knowledge spills from universities into society, making it more productive and healthier. That may well be true; but doing a PhD may still be a bad choice for an individual.

The interests of academics and universities on the one hand and PhD students on the other are not well aligned. The more bright students stay at universities, the better it is for academics. Postgraduate students bring in grants and beef up their supervisors’ publication records. Academics pick bright undergraduate students and groom them as potential graduate students. It isn’t in their interests to turn the smart kids away, at least at the beginning. One female student spoke of being told of glowing opportunities at the outset, but after seven years of hard slog she was fobbed off with a joke about finding a rich husband.
Monica Harris, a professor of psychology at the University of Kentucky, is a rare exception. She believes that too many PhDs are being produced, and has stopped admitting them. But such unilateral academic birth control is rare. One Ivy-League president, asked recently about PhD oversupply, said that if the top universities cut back others will step in to offer them instead.

Noble pursuits
Many of the drawbacks of doing a PhD are well known. Your correspondent was aware of them over a decade ago while she slogged through a largely pointless PhD in theoretical ecology. As Europeans try to harmonise higher education, some institutions are pushing the more structured learning that comes with an American PhD.

The organisations that pay for research have realised that many PhDs find it tough to transfer their skills into the job market. Writing lab reports, giving academic presentations and conducting six-month literature reviews can be surprisingly unhelpful in a world where technical knowledge has to be assimilated quickly and presented simply to a wide audience. Some universities are now offering their PhD students training in soft skills such as communication and teamwork that may be useful in the labour market. In Britain a four-year NewRoutePhD claims to develop just such skills in graduates.

Measurements and incentives might be changed, too. Some university departments and academics regard numbers of PhD graduates as an indicator of success and compete to produce more. For the students, a measure of how quickly those students get a permanent job, and what they earn, would be more useful. Where penalties are levied on academics who allow PhDs to overrun, the number of students who complete rises abruptly, suggesting that students were previously allowed to fester.

Many of those who embark on a PhD are the smartest in their class and will have been the best at everything they have done. They will have amassed awards and prizes. As this year’s new crop of graduate students bounce into their research, few will be willing to accept that the system they are entering could be designed for the benefit of others, that even hard work and brilliance may well not be enough to succeed, and that they would be better off doing something else. They might use their research skills to look harder at the lot of the disposable academic. Someone should write a thesis about that.

Source: http://www.economist.com/node/17723223

Nobody is omniscient.

Yes..I, foolishly, thought that "Proffessors" are god-damn smart, in general, based on which samples of population. Distorted statistics, perception, and expectation.

The fact is that...

Duh...

Why do I have to reinstate the established fact about neurotrophic factors for my reviewers. They are supposed to know this. Duh... troublesome.discouraging. dissapointing. annoying. absurd.

Serfdom in the name of...

Qualifications Gross Starting Salary
Pass Degree $2,550
Pass with Merit $2,850
Honours $3,050 to $3,200

Above is taken from MOE website, a salary you may expect for being a teacher (primary - JC). Quite good offer, isn't it?

Let's compare that to a 'job' with requirement of:
1. minimum second upper class honour
2. expected to work 8-12 hours a day, some including weekends. no overtime compensation, in fact there is no such thing as overtime.
3. Your work may or may not gives result, nobody even sure if the result is exist. Competitors may get the result first, and make your work useless. Very high uncertainty and stress.

For the 'job' you get less than the pass degree holder being a teacher.

Dear friend, the 'job' is being a PhD student.

Some says: PhD students are not bad people, they just made a terrible life choice. :)

Too Bad

What would you do if your advisor suddenly submit a journal paper, with broken English, not comprehensive and absurd elaboration, using your name as first author... without your permission!!!

A Typical Friday Night Talk at A Physics Lab Office

Suddenly I was reminded about something happen around 2 years ago. Things have been so different now, since I'm married and already have an almost-a-month-old cute baby boy. :) But this kind of thing just simply nostalgic. So, I want to share this 'drama scene' with you.

Characters:
PostDoc (PD) #1 = male, 31 years old
GradStudent (GS) #1 = female, age unknown, kept it as a secret, estimated age 27 years old
GradStudent (GS) #2 = male, 24 years old

PD #1: *coming back from outside* Hey, you're all still here..
GS #1: *busy on the phone*
GS #2: *smiling, while reading a research paper, can't concentrate*
GS #2: Is everyone still in the lab?
PD #1: Huh? *seems doesn't understand*
GS #1: You're from the lab right, with boss and PD #2?
PD #1: No. We've just been drinking. Friday night beers. What are you guys doing here?
GS #1: I'm waiting for my boyfriend.
PD #1: Do you have plan tonight?
GS #1: Yes. Dinner.
PD #1: Where?
GS #1: Canteen. *smiling*
PD #1: *smile* What a romantic dinner... (sarcasm).
*turn to GS #2* How about you?
GS #2: What? *still TRYING to read the paper, and another paper, so now TRYING to read 2 papers in a row*
PD #1: Do you have a plan tonight?
GS #2: No. Not me. Just as usual.
PD #1: Haven't find any hot I*d*n*s*an girl?
GS #2: Nope. There's not much I*d*n*s*an girls here doing PhD, even some of them are older than me. But, there are quite many I*d*n*s*an girls as for undergrads.
PD #1: Then go for the undergrads.
GS #2: Yeah, maybe, eventually. *smiling* How about YOU?
PD #1: I won't be here now if I have that kind of plan.
GS #1: But even if you have plan, if you leave now it will be very crowded, right? The MRT? Or you have to wait quite long for the taxi...
PD #1: Yes, you're right.
GS #2: But even if the transportation sucks, you will still enjoy every moment with the girl, right?
PD #1: No, no, not every moment. I used to think that way to when I'm young and innocent. Believe me...
GS #2: Okay. You're obviously have more experience than me. *smile*
*GS #1 cellphone is ringing, she receive it*
GS #1: It's my boyfriend. See you, bye bye... *leave the office*
GS #2: She's the only person here who has personal life. *smiling*
PD #1: Yeah, so sad. *staring at his laptop*
GS #2: *going out to have dinner at canteen*
*finished eating, back to office but it's DARK, no one's there*
*turn on the light, log on to the internet*

Disclaimer: This conversation is not fictional, yet it's also not 100% accurate (based on memory of somebody who almost had permanent head damage). Moreover, most of the conversation was made on joking mode. Any conclusion of characters personality solely based on this conversation will definitely yields erroneous result. :)

Home

The last song from our karaoke session yesterday.
Home by Michael Buble
Enjoy..

--------------------------------------------------------------
Another summer day
Has come and never end
Here in Singapore
And I wanna go home
Mmmmmmmm

Although surrounded by
A thousand things to do
I feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh, I miss life, you know

And I've been seeing all my friends that have succeed
Each enjoy what they did
“I’m fine buddy, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you do not deserve that

Another conference
or paper published
I’m lucky, I know
But I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home

Let me go home
I'm just too far wanna come back
I wanna come home

And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I must go outside
When everything is going right
And I know just why I can not
Come along with this
'Cause this was not my dream
And I always believe it isn't

Another summer day
Has come and never end
In even my precious lab
And I wanna go home
Let me go home

Although surrounded by
A thousand things to do
I feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh, I miss life, you know

Let me go home
I should have run
Oh well, I’m done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be all right
I’ll be home tonight
I’m coming back home
---------------------------------------------------------------

~AYS~
I'mcomingbackhome

Dreyfus model of skill acquisition - Simplified

In theory, there are 5 stages of skill acquisition.

1. Novice

• "rigid adherence to taught rules or plans"
• no exercise of "discretionary judgment"

2. Advanced beginner

• limited "situational perception"
• all aspects of work treated separately with equal importance

3. Competent

• "coping with crowdedness" (multiple activities, accumulation of information)
• some perception of actions in relation to goals
• deliberate planning
• formulates routines

4. Proficient

• holistic view of situation
• prioritizes importance of aspects
• "perceives deviations from the normal pattern"
• employs maxims for guidance, with meanings that adapt to the situation at hand

5. Expert

• transcends reliance on rules, guidelines, and maxims
• "intuitive grasp of situations based on deep, tacit understanding"
• has "vision of what is possible"
• uses "analytical approaches" in new situations or in case of problems

 And this is how Seth Godin simplify these stages..

1. Novice
--wants to be given a manual, told what to do, with no decisions possible

2. Advanced beginner
--needs a bit of freedom, but is unable to quickly describe a hierarchy of which parts are more important than others

3. Competent
--wants the ability to make plans, create routines and choose among activities

4. Proficient
--the more freedom you offer, the more you expect, the more you'll get

5. Expert
--writes the manual, doesn't follow it.
If you treat an expert like a novice, you'll fail.

References:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dreyfus_model_of_skill_acquisition
http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2010/10/getting-smart-about-the-hierarchy-of-smart.html

PhD = jomblo?

PhD bukan alasan untuk tidak punya pacar ataupun tidak menikah.

Sebuah statement yang penting untuk digarisbawahi. Sebelum ataupun saat kamu mengambil PhD.

Ya mungkin saja kamu punya berjuta alasan kenapa kamu "memilih" untuk menjadi jomblo... atau mungkin "terpaksa" menjadi jomblo karena belum juga menemukan pasangan yang cocok... yang kebetulan juga mau sama kamu. Namun di antara alasan-alasan itu, tidak selayaknyalah mengambil PhD menjadi salah satunya.

Kenapa saya katakan demikian?

Ok, coba kita runut alasan-alasan klise yang sering dimunculkan orang berkaitan dengan "keengganan" mulai berpacaran bersamaan dengan "mengambil PhD"

1. Ambil PhD kan sibuk, mana mungkin punya waktu untuk pacaran?
Pacaran di lab, kenapa tidak? :p

Hmm mungkin bukan ide yang cukup bagus. Apalagi kalau di dalam lab terkandung banyak bahan-bahan karsinogen ataupun toxic ataupun flammable. Ga bagus... dan ga sehat. Tapi terlepas dari masalah tempat pacaran, sesungguhnya faktor yang terlebih krusial adalah... waktu.

Apakah PhD punya cukup waktu untuk pacaran?

Well, mungkin saya bukan orang yang percaya bahwa kita terlalu sibuk jika teroccupied untuk sebuah hal. Bahkan untuk PhD sekalipun. Pada dasarnya waktu akan selalu bisa untuk "dibuat" atau "diluangkan"... sejauh kamu memiliki keinginan untuk itu. Dan sejauh kamu menganggap "luangan waktu" itu penting.

Disadari atau tidak, setiap keputusan yang kita ambil itu berdasarkan "value judgement" yang kita letakkan untuk hal-hal tersebut. Kamu mungkin menganggap gelar PhD itu penting untuk dikejar dan diperjuangkan. Namun ingatlah bahwa dalam hidup ini jauh lebih luas daripada mengejar gelar PhD. Kehidupan sosial adalah salah satu yang tak kalah penting.

Dan kehidupan dengan sang pasangan hidup. Tentu saja tak kalah penting.

Semua sebenarnya tergantung dari bagaimana kamu meletakkan value untuk hal-hal yang menurut kamu penting. Dan pada akhirnya, kamu akan meletakkan waktumu untuk hal tersebut.

2. Professor ngepush kerja overtime terus di lab. Ga ada waktu untuk ngapa-ngapain lagi...
Dalam kasus semacam ini, ingatlah satu hal... bahwa ketika kamu tidak bisa menghargai dirimu sendiri, maka orang lain cenderung untuk tidak menghargaimu juga.
Ketika kamu "terlalu menurut" untuk segala sesuatu yang diminta dari dirimu, maka orang lain akan cenderung untuk memanfaatkanmu secara lebih lagi.

Saya setuju bahwa kita harus bersikap generous, murah hati, dan suka menolong. Tapi jangan sampai kebaikan hati itu dimanfaatkan oleh orang lain semata-mata untuk kepentingan mereka sendiri. You need to have self respect to yourself.

Satu kesalahan umum yang saya lihat ada pada kebanyakan PhD students adalah ketakutan mereka yang berlebihan pada advisor mereka. Hmm, advisor selayaknya dihormati, namun bukan berarti mereka punya kuasa dan otoritas sepenuhnya untuk kehidupanmu. Ketika kamu bahkan meletakkan dirimu untuk diatur sedemikian rupa oleh orang lain, kamu bahkan tidak tahu lagi nantinya bagaimana harus mengambil keputusan dalam hidupmu.

Tegaskan batasan yang jelas tentang apa yang kamu perlukan dalam kehidupanmu.

3. PhD gajinya kecil, lom mapan
Well, saya tidak menyangkal bahwa sisi materi itu penting dalam pacaran... apalagi pernikahan. Adalah hal yang terlalu naif jika kamu menikah cuma dengan modal cinta. Tapi ingatlah bahwa pernikahan toh tidak didasarkan semata-mata dari hal materi, tapi terlebih dari kemauan untuk saling menerima keadaan apa adanya.

Saya tidak percaya bahwa gaji PhD itu terlalu kecil sampai-sampai tak cukup untuk memenuhi kebutuhan hidup. Ketika 2 tahun lalu saya memulai PhD, saya masih punya uang cukup untuk ditabung. Yang jumlahnya sebenarnya masih cukup seandainya uang itu diperlukan untuk 2 orang sekaligus. Ya tentunya dengan kehidupan sederhana dan ala kadarnya. Tapi kembali kepada topik pernikahan, kehidupan pernikahan seperti apa sih yang kamu inginkan? Yang bergelimang uang. Tapi toh kebahagiaan kan tidak bisa dibeli semata-mata dengan uang.

Kemapanan adalah faktor penting... tapi bukan faktor terpenting. Dan hal itu tidak seharusnya menjadi alasan seandainya memang sebuah hubungan sudah siap untuk dilanjutkan untuk fase pacaran ataupun pernikahan. Jika memang belum saatnya, bersabarlah.

* * *

In conclusion, jangan jadikan PhD sebagai alasan untuk tidak memiliki pacar. Ataupun tidak menikah. Sesungguhnya kamu bisa, seandainya kamu mau. Everything just depends on how you think about it.


Regards
~HgS~

Pretty much what's happening everyday. I guess the moral story of this is to be spontaneous? haha..well..since planning ahead only seems to be a of waste time, paper and brain resources. :)
oh...of course the power of "kepepet" is another unexplained phenomena yet happening everyday. We could just squeeze everything during the lunch hour.. right?

Negeri di Awan??

Syair lagu lagi nih Gan..
Ijin ngepost dulu :) (Kaskus mode: ON)

--------------------------------------------------------------
Di dalam kantormu Kuderita mabuk dan pusing
Yang tidak pernah kualami Di masa lalu
Ku datang padamu Kubawakan otak yang lugu
Sebelum diriku mengerti Akibat PhD

Kau membuat diriku menyadari
Tiada negeri di awan
Hanya kerja nggak jelas DAn tidak terarah
Dan kini tengah merusak otak dan s'luruh jiwaku.. ooo

Ternyata otakmu Penuh dengan ide nan gila
Yang kau ungkapkan tiap hari Padaku yang malang ini...
--------------------------------------------------------------

~AYS~
bulanterakhir

10 reasons Ph.D. students fail

Hi friends.

This is just another sharing.

10 easy ways to fail a Ph.D.

Hi teman2 :)

Saya cuma mau share

:):D

In the end

Towards graduation, still few more works to be done. Even though I don’t feel like working anymore. In a meeting, my boss told me “You have to go. I don’t want to see you anymore.” The reason? “You’d been great student for the first 2.5 years. After that, done. I have no idea what’d happened to you”. Well, 2.5 years after I joined PhD, which was 2009. I also have no idea what’d happened. Let analyze. 2009, what were going on during that period?

1. I moved to ‘better’ HDB flat, with nice flatmates. Did not endure the feeling of ‘tidak betah di rumah’ anymore (sumpah, gua ngga tahu bahasa Inggris yang bagusnya apa.)
2. Riani was coming to town. (did it have any bad effects?)
3. My roommate was ‘forced’ to leave, aka graduate for the sake of his boss’ advancement. I also watched some friends in my batch leaving.
4. Some of my works were done. Believe it or not, they are still at my boss’ desk till now for his gorgeous expectations.
5. I was going for holiday without any permission from my boss for a week. Thanks to my generous flatmate, which at that very moment, also started becoming an economic freak.
6. My ‘decent’ FYP students graduated. A ‘geniously nerdy smart’ FYP student started working with me.
7. It’s simply the ‘essential nature’ of what PhD should be.

Hmm.. I didn’t really aware on my deteriorating performance though. I just feel fine. Anyway, which point do you think has the most significant effect? I vote for the last one.

~AYS~
lagipilek

Ooooooh Wooooooh

Ooooooh Wooooooh, Ooooooh Wooooooh

I want freedom I'm on fire, I want real job, pay me higher
See my thesis, takes its shape now, lot of chapters, make me feel proud
In the office I am writing though no result to be proud of
Graduation it sorrounds me, every thinking makes me happy

I will forever leave, all the jobs underneath research
Lets rejoice welcoming the day
and bid farewell at the end of this job
I will say

When I was younger I really dumber
I took PhD thinking it's my life path
I go to the lab do nothing but slack
Without feeling bad and then it goes
When I graduate my research ended
They'll call me pity, I'll call it is my fate
I want my life back without feeling bad
Without getting sacked to have a new life

Ooooooh Wooooooh, Ooooooh Wooooooh

~AYS~
thesiswritinginprogress

Way back into life

Another 'GJ' song that is dedicated to you. Taken from 'Way back into love' by Hugh Grant and Haley Bennett

---------------------------------------------------------------------
I’ve been living with uncertain overhead
I’ve been working for no result in my lab
I’ve been slacking for so long
Trapped in project, I just can’t seem to move on

I’ve been giving all my hopes and dreams away
Just to find I made worst mistake in my life
I’ve been setting aside time
To regret and blame my thinking that was on my mind

All I wanna do is find a way back into life
I can’t make it through without quitting this kind of life
Oh oh oh

I’ve been working but the prof feels it’s a fail
I’ve been searching but I just can’t make it right
I doubt it can be done
Whether there is something I can do somewhere

I’ve been looking for someone to shed some light
Not somebody just to scold me for the craps
I may have some direction
But it’s turned down by your suggestions

All I wanna do is find a way back into life
I can’t make it through without quitting this kind of life
And if I open my eyes again
I’m sure I’m hoping this PhD is coming to the end

Now it’s moment when I hope to make it real
Don’t care if you feel the way I feel
I need graduation
Not just another negotiation cocok banget buat HgS

All I wanna do is find a way back into life
I can’t make it through without quitting this kind of life
And if I start my career on you
I’m hoping you’ll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
Promise that I’ll be there for you till the end

~AYS~

We should have known these stuffs!!

The practical thing!

        

For those who just wanna quit!!

For those who love to dream!

For those who being too delusional

www.stuffnoonetoldme.blogspot.com

let's sing a song.. =)

Have you ever heard this kind of song before?
Well.. for us.. Indonesian.. I bet that almost all of you know this song.. then.. let's we sing together =)

"Bangun Tidur.. Kuterus mandi...
Tidak lupa.. menggosok gigi..
Habis mandi.. Ku tOlong Ibu..
Membersihkan tempat tdr ku.."

Well.. i just want to change the lyric a little bit.. so keep singing with original rhythm.

"Bangun Tidur.. Kupandang alarm..
Oh tidakk.. koq sudah pagi...
Mata ngantuk.. Pikiran buntu..
Kenapa harus kembali ke lab.."


Another song

"Baju ku dulu.. Tak begini..
Tapi kini tak cukup lagi..
Ku pintar.. Ku besar.. Kutambah tinggi..
Scott's emulsion.. Tuk tumbuh.. besar.."


"Hidup ku dulu.. Tak begini..
Sebelum ku masuk pi etch di..
Ku bosan.. Ku jenuh.. Ngelab.. Terus..
Oh pi etch di.. Kapan berakhirr..."

-habis suntuk ngelab hasil ga jelas mulu..-

Legendary advisor's quotes over time

" Work hard. Work overtime. " (first conversation after PhD intake)

" What time did you wake up everyday? Come directly to lab. Btw, when is the last bus to your home?" (second conversation after PhD intake)

" You are here to do research. I believe subject is not a big matter for you. Don't just sit here to study coursework and read paper. Go to lab and learn something." (about second week after PhD intake)

" The most important thing to do is be hardworking. Don't consider yourself as a normal office worker who come at 9 and go back at 5 or 6. Work overtime. Come on the weekend. It applied to all of you." (lab meeting 2008, message to one of my junior)

" You should do experiment on the day and read paper at night " (lab meeting, end of 2008)

" You think you are that special? Please tell me the things you can do that other people cannot do " (2008)

" Don't worry about QE. It can still drag until 2 years time " (2009)

" I consider my lab members as people very close to m" I push you for your own good, to achieve your dream "e after my family " (lab meeting, 2009)

" To be a good teacher, you should have good publication " (one time in 2009)

(the crash day, 2009)

" Publication is more important than graduation " (2009, to one of senior)

" I would like to treat lunch for you all for my promotion to associate. But try to find close place so you can come back to lab to work " (2010)

" I know I don't treat you so well in the past few years but... please don't go so early. Can you just try to stay here for a while?" (mid of 2010)

Have u heard of "Henri Poincaré"

I stumbled across some blogs and you guess what I found...


Ehmm..am thinking of the equivalent of Robert Greene.. but for science.. Geez am a geek still.


One of his many eloquent quotes, it makes me think if I do "love" science for real..


"The scientist does not study nature because it is useful to do so. He studies it because he takes pleasure in it, and he takes pleasure in it because it is beautiful. If nature were not beautiful it would not be worth knowing, and life would not be worth living. I am not speaking, of course, of the beauty which strikes the senses, of the beauty of qualities and appearances. I am far from despising this, but it has nothing to do with science. What I mean is that more intimate beauty which comes from the harmonious order of its parts, and which a pure intelligence can grasp."


"It is by logic that we prove, but by intuition that we discover. To know how to criticize is good, to know how to create is better."


"Logic teaches us that on such and such a road we are sure of not meeting an obstacle; it does not tell us which is the road that leads to the desired end. For this, it is necessary to see the end from afar, and the faculty which teaches us to see is intuition. Without it, the geometrician would be like a writer well up in grammar but destitute of ideas."


Ughhh..never would I flirt using science in this manner....it is just too much unless for Sheldon!!


References: Wikipedia, http://arunn.info/.

I don't care

Hey perfectionist
It's about stubbornness
And I simply couldn't cope
I had to do all these craps for the sake of your irrational expectation you know
Now I will act like I don't care
That's the only way I can graduate

~AYS~
terbawaemosi

Happy Reading :)

The Professors Who Won't Retire (<-- Click)

the boundary of a PhD: where we are

hi friends :)

just wanna share u all a link.
*i'd like to really write them by myself at e 1st time tho, but i declined that idea when i thought about copyright (although i really can just copy-paste-rephrase it and just state e referral source link at e end of the post, however rephrasing them might deviate the 1st intention of making it sound funny).
so here is the link: The illustrated guide to a Ph.D.

so Keep Pushing.

Enjoy! :)

5 Stages of PhD

Inspired from "5 stages of grief" with some modifications and arrangements.

1. Acceptance
Feel the excitement on becoming PhD student? See.. you would be working towards the most prestigious degree in society where all people think that you are the chosen people. In addition, well.. steady stipend during the next 3 or 4 years? An offer which is too god to refuse.

"Hooray.. I was accepted"; "I will become PhD student's model. Publishing 7 high impact journals? I am confident that I can. etc..etc.."

2. Depression
As time goes by, you realize that the things do not always go well. Whenever you have bad outcomes and you see that extremely good results in the journals you just read. Whenever you can't do the job because your boss has no enough money or no equipment.. or whenever your boss blame you for not following his/her suggestions

"Why it doesn't work" "It's not supposed to be like this"

3. Anger
Bad results, no publications until your stipend period is reaching its end, plus there is no sign from your boss that he/she will let you graduate very soon. Hey.. he/she said that he/she still have plenty crazy ideas to explore on your thesis work.

"Aaarghhh.. I was fed up." "I am going to be crazy with all these things"

3. Denial
You realize that PhD may not be best life decision for you. You simply do not passionate enough to do the research thing and pursue all possible opportunities to expand your work given all limiting constraints you (and your boss) have. In addition, you may gain envious on your 'no-brain' friends do well and earn more than you do.

"May be I should not take PhD in the first place" "What the hell I was thinking before?"

5. Bargaining
Dear my beloved professor.. Please let me graduate. Thank you.


~AYS~
laginyarikerja..adalowongan?

300710

Below is the way the school announces and makes freak proper encouragement for the student to attend a conference. (It might only applied to our school though)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear all

This is for your information. Any interested student please note that you will be required to provide your own conference support from project funds or similar sources. School will not be providing conference support.

The Inaugural International Conference of bla. bla. bla.. will be held at University of bla.. bla.. (6000 kms away)

The deadline for submission is two weeks from now.

~AYS~
menatapagustuskelabu

The conference

For postgrad students, any conference is perfect networking platform where many academicians and professors are around. In addition, the conference organizers always generously provide these 'tea breaks' and 'long hour lunch'. Thus, it's just 'perfect' for idea exchange, grasp some lights for your research for the experts, and (if you are lucky) get a job offer (as postdoc/professor of course).

You can imagine that, there were 'nerdy alien' discussion throughout the corridor. Some (good) students were talking proudly about their work, where they could do something extraordinary before (in fact, it is something usual using 'my boss' standard and to be honest, my boss is extraordinary). Standing alone in the corner and slowly munch your meals is strongly not recommended. What can you gain by that?

I am not against these arrangements, but for me hearing those 'Pandora like' language during lunch is just.. torturing. A 'proper English' conversation on any 'career networking' are much more refreshing.

AYS

barupulangconferencedisingapurlho

Question and Answer

" Why the result you show is this and that? How is the procedure of your experiment. How can you explain?"
" I add this compound and this then the result is like that. The explanation is here... "
" I don't understand. Explain to me tomorrow morning "

The next day.

Come in the morning, do lab work, search paper, and still wait until almost lunch time. Then boss ask other lab member to call me...
" You read my mail yesterday?"
" Yes "
" I don't understand about your last reply "
" Yes, I know "
" Why don't you come here this morning to explain?"
.
.
.
" Well, I think person who don't understand is the one who should approach first. "

Give Thanks

PhD may not be a perfect position, may not be a perfect job, may not be a perfect status... or condition. In fact it's a risky choice to be taken after you finish your undergrad degree. Whether you can be success in research area and continue career as professor, or may stuck in post doc forever after that. Or else, you need to switch career from research.

Well, life is the matter of choice, isn't it?

Whether you think this choice is right or wrong is actually the matter of your mind to choose it. If you think it's wrong, so it would be wrong forever... and ever. If you wanna focus how wrong it is why you chose this particular project, this particular professor, this particular course, and of course this particular status as PhD candidate, you'll gonna stuck there forever.

Well, PhD may not be the best choice or pathway for some (or maybe all) of us, but let us stop to think that it's wrong or how wrong it is or how pity we are inside PhD. Even that it's really really really wrong, stop thinking about the wrongness... At least from the mistake we have learnt something new in our life. No experience would be wasted, no matter how bad it is. The simple way is just... keep moving on.

To think how bad our current condition won't bring us forward. To complain about difficult research won't make it easier. In fact it just makes it harder. Stop complaining and start working. Start to smile for your work though it is tough. Coz only toughness can make you to be stronger person.

I'm not a perfect person without any single complain. In fact I did it due to some of my unbearable circumstances. However, after some time, I realize that it's just something that's not too right to do that. By complaining, you just cannot move forward. You are just stuck on your current condition. It won't change anything. Mostly it would make it worse.

The key of moving forward is by start giving thanks.
Thanks for the current position we have with this stable income.
Thanks for this particular job we have.
Thanks for peers and friends around us.
Thanks for everything.

Well, actually I'm not a wise person to tell people about all of this things. But at least, I just wanna enlighten our day. With a simple thanks and gratitude.


Regards
~HgS~

Fleeing Faraway

If I had the option to flee, would I take it?
It is indeed not an easy decision
When I looked back this past (almost) four years
On all those efforts and courages that I have put
It's really pathetic
Even though most of them are indeed futile
Unfortunately, I do not have that option
I am not a risk-taker
It's hard to imagine that I wouldn't have any income
If I was stubborn and took the option even though I did not possess it
Well, that is the only reason I can think of
On why I still here
If I had no other option but flee
That may be the case
Because I know myself, my intelligence, aptitude, and ability
That have been pushed far beyond what they supposed to
In addition to deterioration of my brain quality
Or if it is a matter of jealousy
A sign of desperation?
For those are the reasons why so many efforts were in vain

Maybe, it is the time to make that option available
Then I can flee faraway from this world
With peace in mind as I will have made the right decision
For my better life.

~AYS~
dalamkeadaanputusasa

Afternoon Talk

Conversation between me and colleague...
" Hi, you look so busy? "
" Yup..."
" What are you doing?"
" I'm looking for job."
" Oooh ic. Hmm, can I ask you for a help?"
" Yes?"
" If you find any job that that has the requirement suits me well, can you let me know also?"
" What criteria you want?"
" First of all... no research job"
" Errr ok. Then?"
" I think teaching job would be interesting. In any private school or polytechnic. Something that give me chance to meet many people and interact a lot."
" How about something like marketing or any banking."
" Quite interesting... as long as there is no research job."
" Ouw ok. Got it. Something else?"
" Well, I look for good payment and one important thing is..."
" No research job? "
" Exactly."
" Ok."
" Well, let me revise my requirement a bit. If then it's really really really difficult for finding job outside research for me. I may still consider back to do reserach."
" Why?"
" As long as that research job has no affiliation to this lab "
" :s "

The "PROF"

What does the acronym 'PROF' stand for? Literally, 'Professor'. Another meaning (taken from one of prof where I did my undergrad) is (P)erfect, (R)ational, (O)riented, and (F)unctional

PERFECT
He/she is a perfect figure, who can guide and nurture his/her students. A role model on 'research' aptitude and attitude.
vs
He/she is a perfect figure in front of other profs working in the same area. It is mandatory to snatch grants needed to sustain his/her work.

RATIONAL
Especially in the expected research outcome, based on the money he/she has, its probablity of success based on established theory, and his/her expertise on the area.
vs
Especially in the number of papers he/she should publish within a given time period. It often results in irrational working hours for his/her students.

ORIENTED
The research orientation is set for clear achievement, a further step (or leap) towards certain ultimate goal.
vs
The research orientation is to publish as many papers as possible, to fulfil certain requirement.

FUNCTIONAL
is capable to manage his/her students based on their unique aptitude for mutual learning
vs
is capable to manage his/her students up to their maximum time and effort they can give.

'Simbang' for me. How 'bout u?

~AYS~
ngantuk

Among Teacher, Researcher, and Professor

Teacher's job is to make something complicated to be simpler. (to make the students understand easier)

Researcher's job is to make something simple to be more compicated. (to make it sounds more scientific)

Professor's job is to make nothing to be very complicated.

071410

Kondisi:

Paper yang udah disubmit ke jurnal baru aja dibalikin dan reviewernya nanya macam2 yang sebenarnya ngga gitu penting (dari 3 reviewer, sepertinya cuma 1 yang benar2 baca paper gua sampai beres). Akibatnya, bos nyuruh eksperimen tambahan buat meyakinkan si reviewer2 itu.

Suatu siang di hari Selasa:

"Jadi, kita perlu ngecek ulang prosedur ini, karena hasilnya ngga bakal dimasukin ke paper, kamu lakuin ini buat 'nominal condition' aja ya, 2 kondisi yang lain gak usah. Ga penting.."

Hari rabu siang:

"Kamu itu kok cuma kerjain yang bagian ini doang, yang lain mana. Kalau kerja jangan setengah2 dong!!!"

"wth.. yesterday u never told me like that lah.. @!!$#@!#

~AYS~

lampusepedaguahilangT.T

Well

Dear ***

I'm stick with my plan to graduate by the end of this year and I have signed a contract to start working in January 2011. This notification is just to inform that you can start to find new slave student (if any) to continue the project. Good luck.

Regards
***

* * *

See me tomorrow morning.

When you say nothing at all

[Ronan Keriting] >> Let regard him as a PhD student with the 'keriting' mind, thanks to his dazzling bad result and his boss' pressure.

Okay.. Let's sing together..
--------------------------------------------------------------
It's torturing the way you speak right to my heart
It's like saying a word, I can't light up the dark
Try as I may I could never explain
What I get when I do all the things

[CHORUS]
The grim on your face lets me know you're unhappy
There's a truth in your eyes saying you want to sack me
The gnash on your teeth says you blame me whenever I fail
I know it best when you say nothing at all

All day long I work here doing what you have told
After you scold me there you drown out the will
Try as I may I could never define
What's went wrong whether your mind or mine

Back to CHORUS...
------------------------------------------------------------------

~AYS~
ikutanpergigakya

funny talk at night..

Well.. just a "normal" converstation between PhDs at one night ( including former, surrender, current, and want to be )

Actually the topic is very simple:
"How to fry a fine bakwan"
Suddenly the talk flow into this direction:

1. Topic: How to fry a fine bakwan
2. Problem: Oil content in the bakwan will reduce its cruncyness
3. Hypothesis:
- Addition of baking soda will help to absorb the oil content
- Best composition between baking soda-oil -bakwan-fluor-water will determine the best taste of the bakwan
4. Method of analysis:
- Different compositions of baking soda-oil-bakwan-fluor-water, minimal three times replication to get the standard error
- Phase diagram between baking soda diluted in water-oil-water
- Sample tester to determine the taste quality and appearance
- Replace baking soda addition with another hydrophilic and lipophilic compount to cover the bakwan, and compare the result with baking soda yield. ( literature review needed )
5. Result:
- Based on the graph and table it shows that.. xxx... yyy... zzzz... so, addition of aaa... and bbb.. with composition d:e:f is the best
- Addition of www gives higher effect in term of oil content reduction compare to baking soda
6. Conclusion:
- The best composition to fry bakwan with low oil content and long lasting quality is bla bla bla...

*this paper has been submitted to Journal of HauTuKuk, with Maknyuss as an associate reviewer*

Well.. some parts are already editted by me, but most of the ideas are based on what the last conversation about =P

-end-

Thought Improvement

Who said that PhD mindet just stuck without any improvement? Not necessarily true. Well, at least we are trained to face any cases in "parallel" way...

First year: Full time PhD, not much time for anything else
Second year: Still full time PhD, part time teacher.
Third year: Full time teacher, part time PhD.
.
.
Final year plan: Full time teacher and start business, with spare time for PhD.

Can I?

Analogy between PhD and diving

Just had this thought when chatted with my friends before..

Suddenly get an inspiration about what is the similarity between PhD and diving

Imagine that you are in the ocean.. you are already at the boat.. and you look at the sea.. wondering what is inside. Since you can't see anything at the surface.. Maybe you just think that ocean is very beautiful inside, there are corals, fishes, etc..
-> same as PhD.. if you are not at that world, you will not know what is trully inside.. maybe you will just think that PhD is a nice world, since you get paid by just studying =P

After several time wondering.. you just think.. "Err.. I want to look a little bit closer to the sea, and feel the sensastion of the sea myself.." So.. you take one step ahead by putting down your foot into the sea, and tried to look what is inside using your bare eyes..
--> the first year of PhD.. you don't know what actually you are going to do.. so you just read a lot of journal papers.. but seems like it is still okay, coz the deadline is still sooo far away.. so you still can a little bit relax..
*this condition is not universal applied.. depends on who are your boss*

Suddenly you fall out to the sea because you lack of balance.. Panic mode on, because you haven't used your complete diving equipment yet.. You lose your sight ( since you can't see inside the water ), You run out of breath ( since you haven't used your oxygen tank, and in panic state, so you suddenly lose all of your swimming ability ). Because you lose all your sensing, you are afraid of several dangers in the sea, such as shark, etc..
--> the second year of PhD.. you become panic, because you are not doin enough in your first year, but you have an ultimate deadline within 2 years, which is QE... panic because you don't have any significant result, no proper experimental procedure yet, and become worst when you fell that no one is able to help you to solve the problems.. And you are forced to finish your report, with at least.. significant datas..

After you are gettin calm and gettin used to the ocean condition.. Maybe you will think.. "Okay.. why don't I swim to the surface, pick up my google, and dive.. since I am already soaked..". So, you go to the surface, take your google, and diving at the ocean.. Although the ocean is not as beautiful as what you thought at the first time.. Well.. you still continue to dive since you are already wet all over the body..
--> third and fourth year after your QE.. well.. somehow you already have a "proper" direction of your research.. Although you think that actually you don't care with your work, but since you already go too deep into this world.. And seem like that there is no point of return.. No other choice.. you just have to used to it, and face it until the end..

*wondering when will I be at my "diving" state, instead of "drowning" state*
=P

=="

Whoaa... Even though I have been in this 'tiny little gloomy' cocoon for few years, I never expect that this things really happens somewhere else in the world (or may be it is indeed the norm). Well, should be grateful for that whatsoever.

~AYS~

tidaklagimerindukanmu

Overheard

One day, several persons have their meals in a food stall together. Some of them are PhDs. Then

A, struggling to pour the soya sauce to her meal)
Why the sauce wouldn't come out?

B, one of the PhD student, who is doing research in fluid mechanics
Oh.. soya sauce is non-Newtonian fluid. So you should pour it like this.
(he took the sauce and poured it to her meal easily)

Another good side of being PhD student. You won't find any difficulties pouring sauces to your meals. Some people even have good ideas on what is the SCIENCE behind it..

~AYS~
merindukanmu

Translation

Dear members of the NTU community

Convocation 2010: Invitation to Ceremony 1

The University Convocation is a major event in our University's calendar. From 26 to 31 July 2010, the University will hold 17 ceremonies and graduate more than 9000 students.

Chancellor of NTU, His Excellency President S R Nathan, will preside at the first ceremony. Chancellor will be conferring Honorary Doctorates on individuals who have rendered distinguished service to the University or the community in the advancement of learning and knowledge or who have contributed significantly to the development of their country or the betterment of society and international relations. The recipients of the Lee Kuan Yew Gold Medal and the Koh Boon Hwee Scholars Award as well as the pioneer class of C N Yang Scholars will also be presented.

We would like to invite you to attend the first Convocation 2010 ceremony to celebrate this meaningful and joyous occasion to mark the success of our graduates. Details of the event are as follows:

Date of ceremony: 26 July 2010, Monday
Time: 10.00 am – 12.30 pm
Venue: Nanyang Auditorium, NTU

You are also welcome to join the graduates and guests at the Quad after the ceremony to witness the Class Plaque Laying Ceremony.

All guests are requested to be seated by 9.30 am.
Please click here to confirm your attendance and for details of the ceremony.
Kindly ignore this email if you have been invited to be a member of the academic procession at this ceremony.

* * *

In PhD languange, it can be translated just to one sentence:

FREE LUNCH!! =)

1.5 years..

1.5 years have been passed in Singapore..
time to reflect back to what I was in previous 1.5 years.

Several records that have been achieved:
1. get to know new people
2. able to live abroad
3. meet him
4. save some dollar
5. improve my english level --> *although just veryyyy little.. but still ok la.. at least get an improvement*

but.. *damn* none of those things are in term of academic achievements, such as:
1. no significant result
2. no paper has been published
3. no proper experimental method has been determined
4. no direction in term of recent research and future work
5. no gain a confidence in front of the boss..

So.. based on your opinion.. are there any significant achievements in my 1.5 years? =P

- gettin crazy with my own job...-

Sebuah kisah

Membeli prata kari terpisah
Kala kumakan mual melanda
Hati gembira bercampur resah
Kala kupakai jubah wisuda

Gank riani kuasai Jogja
Sang musuh mundur sampai ke gua
Berkali-kali melamar kerja
Kabar baik tak datang jua

Membeli makan di kantin A
Tiga dolar tiada rasa
Tak disangka datang si dia
Dari Singapura mencari mangsa

Bulan depan perpanjang sewa
Uang gaji kantor habis semua
Dengan rayuan uang beasiswa
Ditambah gelar doktor bagi semua

Andai di sini ada si Melda
Semua bonekanya kan kusandera
Kini di sini daku berada
despo PhD student di Singapura

(expecting to write the sequels)

~AYS~
habiskehujanan

paper Oh paper...

PhD --> "Paper harus Diproduksi"

Well.. actually PhD is just a simple job.. in which we have to produce paper.. the more the better..
the higher impact factor the better.. more cited the better.. etc etc.. and another important point "first author" is very important.

Today, just did an experiment from 10am to 7pm.
Got a good result, just need to check its reproducibility, take a picture, and voilaa.. paper published *hope so..*
Felt happy.. but after 1 hour.. realized
"Gosh.. it was not my own paper --" "

Yes, the result was actually my experiment collaboration with MSE students.
The actual job description seemed like already defined:
1. me: supply the protein sample
2. MSE: supply the polymer, did the measurement, supply the topic.
3. both of us: thinking about the reason why and contribute each ideas..
*well.. from the job description.. you know la.. who contributed more...* T.T

In order to survive in this PhD world.. it seemed that "second author" is not quite important.
*klo mw dibilang kasar.. kolaborasi dengan hasil penulis kedua bisa diidentikkan dengan istilah menjadi budak nya budak prof laen* apa lagi klo tujuan sebenar nya melenceng, tidak terlalu nyambung topik, kontribusi kecil.. jadi merasa jadi budak aje.. --"

So.. in my case.. well.. it seems that I couldn't really happy with this result..
well.. honestly, I become a little bit happy. at last, I can show somethin in my report and exam.
But.. for the boss side.. well.. I know that she will not feel so much happy with this, and will still chase me for my own result and my own paper..

Hikz... T-T

- thinkin2.. ponderin2... procrastinating her own topic -

Paper Review

Juragan: "Gimana paper ini menurut lu?"

Gua: "Yah, hasil keren, mantap, tapi caranya ampas, dapet yang bagus gara2 hoki doang"

(boleh dibaca, boleh diskip) >> dia mau cari nilai maksimum dari sesuatu, caranya brutal, ngambil angka sembarang dicoba satu2, sampai ga bisa nemu hasil yang lebih baik >> kalau gua bilang ide ini ke bos gua, pasti gua langsung dimarahi di tempat..

Juragan: "Iya, pertama kali gua baca juga ni paper sampah"

Gua: "Err.."

Juragan: "Tapi dia ngutip paper gua dua.. jadi gua nanti recommend biar paper ini diterima aja deh. pendek ini, buat ngabisin 3 halaman jurnal doang si gpp la.. cincai"

>> Bagi kami di dunia riset, salah satu parameter kerjaan kita menarik atau gak adalah berapa banyak kutipan (citation) dari paper yang udah kita publish dari orang2. Semakin banyak kutipan, berarti paper kita semakin keren.. semakin menarik.. semakin berpengaruh.. entah itu baik atau buruk, yang pasti paper2 ini sudah berpengaruh besar buat gua (for snatching my youth, quote by PY)

~AYS~

merenungtentangmasadepan

E-mail

I have added the SEM figure to figure 2 (file attached)

Regards
---

* * *

Is this your best image? E Colis looks funny and they aggregate. Can you find a better image or do SEM again?

* * *

Here are the list of other good SEM images. There are some with low or high magnification. There are also some area where the cells are not aggregate. I chose that particular picture (I sent before) to present high density E.coli. When they grow, actually E.coli like to aggregate themselves and form clumps.

So just choose which one you prefer. Thanks.


Best Regards,
---

* * *

All these are not presentable.

* * *

Ok. Then I don't think it's necessary to present the SEM image.

Best Regards,
---

* * *

---, there is not half-way research. As a researcher, we should make things as perfect as we can and present the best as we can get and make something you will be proud of. Please do SEM again. This is not too difficult to do.

* * *

Two things you need to know:
1. I'm not proud to be called as a researcher and for any research work I have done. If you are proud, it's up to you. So please don't use the word 'we'.
2. SEM is not something easy to do, especially for living creatures. If you think it is easy, you can do it yourself.

things that I fear..

When I was a little girl.. I kind of afraid several things:
1. dark
2. ghost
3. height and high speed
4. cockroachs, spider, snake, etc..
5. dentist, and so on..
no need to display here.. cause it will make this blog over-loaded

And now.. since I am growing older, I realize.. that I need to add my list..
and.. since a year ago.. this is the new update thing that I add
"BOSS"

-end-

Quest

An interesting inspiration from one of Suhu's blog post. When it was modified then.. it turns out to be..

Job with higher pay.... many..

More prestige job... there are..

Job that utilize your brain until (beyond, in some cases) its limit...

Don't waste your time to find one...

PhD student.. we really pro(u)d of this job...

~AYS~

--dedicated to those who celebrate his/her anniversary joining 'gloomy' PhD world shortly--

Just my 50 cents.. (enough for a cup of coffee though)

Just read a 'spooky' post from fellow phd student. The research was a failure, the results were junkie (according to the boss for sure), no appreciation for the failure work (well, nobody shd expect that @ the first place). For us, the experience and feeling are really easy to be understood. Okay, forget it, life must go on, then what can 'we' do about it? Well.. let's see (However, this might be on case to case basis, depends on how desperate and freak your boss is)..

1. It is ILLICIT to use 'weekend' as the reason for not doing experiment. Our working hours is same with the opening time of 7-11 mart (24/7). Wish that your boss would understand those Korean dramas await you @ home? that you had appointment on bbq party @ East Coast.. Well.. indeed, you wish!! 

2. Bad results need not be reported (it applies to my boss).. 

Student: I have tried method A, unsuccessful, B also sucks, C useless.

Prof: Okay, then why shd we do?

Student: Dunno

Prof (fingers point to the door): Go back to ur office. Find out. Report to me once you find.

Student: Okay

Never report anything after that. Although stlll working, get other suck results. What's the point going to that 'court' only to be scolded and tormented. 

Finally one day (after few days of suck researches and many days of 'blank'ing

Prof: So, what is happening

Student: Nothing

Prof: How could nothing happening

Student: Well...

Prof: What happens to you. u've any personal problem? Okay. Let's go for a coffee..

Well, to be honest the personal problem is myself, where the self-motivation was on its lowest level (and still decreasing).. Nevertheless, need to be grateful when the boss have good skill to motivate w/o any need to talk crap 

~AYS~

harussemangat

That sense of curiousity

All that whining during your PhD. ..

Having to find a topic (or expand your topic to make it long enough so that you have enough things to do during your PhD)

Having to meet deadline set by your boss...

Having to deal with the not so sensible bureaucracy, as if they are made to make your life more difficult, part of your PhD training....

Having to make presentation slide last minute...

Having to write your QE report (with no significant progress, if any....)

Having to write paper, how your result is significant, justifying your result, or bullshitting how your result could save humanity

Having to redo your experiment because someone accidentaly turn off your instrument, or throw away your cells thinking that it is a waste

All your experiments fail. you have tried all possibles ways you could think of...

That your are neither a student with full privileged as a student (access to cheaper accomodation, transportation) nor a working adult

That you are nobody, have no social life, you only know the way from your home to your lab

Depressing it is.

Sometimes you feel like you are giving up. Don't care anymore.

So why you are here? What keep you going?

Is it because of stipend? If you are smart enough to enter Phd programme, then I'm sure you are smart enough to get a job.

May be because of commitment? coz giving up is not in your dictionary?

Whatever is the reason that stopping you from quitting, you need to find a way to at least enjoy it.

For me, it is as simple as curiosity. Curiosity to find out how to solve problems. How insignificant they are. All that problems will cease away for a moment (at least) when your curiosity is answered.

So what keep you going?

to add to the truth*

edited.

yest talked to my prof.

Prof: "i am making your proposal now. so what are ur testing about? last time u told me b4"

me: "ok prof, i am testing these types of connections."

Prof: "oh, so is it wif slab? or u wanna add frame to it?"

me: "no prof, i dun think to do it with slab. not even frame, just purely e connections."

Prof: "but, if u make proposal only like tis. it's like master then. not PhD. cos the proposal is too short."

me: "??!"

Tis gave me conclusion that, PhD is just another 2 more years of torture after a Master: just to show that you do more things than a commoner, and so that your proposal just gets longer. :|| *oh goodness i hope tis torture come to its end soon . .

The bitter truth...

Hmm...This is what's actually going on..a little bit too honest, isn't it?

Just another Wendy Macnaughton's piece

Things happen

Things Happen
by Wendy MacNaughton

This applies to PhD too.. as to all humans . :P

PhD itu tidak Seburuk yang Kamu Kira

Dear semua pembaca setia (jikalau ada)

Walau sebenarnya postingan-postingan di bawah seringkali memojokkan dunia PhD, menunjukkan kesulitan-kesulitan dan tekanan yang kami alami, yah kalau bisa ditilik-tilik kembali... sebenernya dunia PhD itu tidak seburuk yang kalian bayangkan kok.

Sepertilah ada buku best-seller yang berjudul "positive thinking" ataupun "How to think big" dan sejenis-jenisnya... maka biarlah kami mencoba disini mengaplikasikan sebuah ungkapan pernyataan syukur dan juga secercah "positive mindset" yang kami miliki. Well, percayalah... our life is not that bad anyway.

Coba saja kita melihat fakta-fakta berikut:

1. Kami mendapat 'gaji'...
Ya walaupun jumlahnya di bawah rata-rata pasaran gaji bagi lulusan S1 disini, paling tidak kami masih mendapat 'gaji' untuk apapun yang kami perbuat (entah itu berguna atau tidak). Gaji yang toh masih cukup untuk memenuhi kebutuhan hidup kami sehari-hari dan menyisakan sejumlah uang untuk ditabung. Kalau dipikir-pikir dan dibandingkan dengan gaji di Indonesia sih jumlahnya ya... cukup wah. Dibanding pengangguran, our life is still better. So... no need to complain loh. Just smile and be happy...

2. Pekerjaan kami keliatannya ga berat-berat amat kok...
Dan mungkin karena ketidakberatan itulah yang justru membuat kami menjadi kurang motivated ataupun lebih tepatnya... merasa tidak berguna. Kami tidak bisa melihat kegunaan langsung dari apa yang kami kerjakan. Semua yang kami lakukan hanyalah demi kemajuan ilmu penghetahuan dan teknologi (yang belum pasti maju). Tidak seperti di perusahaan yang mana kami langsung berhubungan dengan kepentingan client ataupun customer. Kami terbiasa ditekan professor yang biasanya menganggap kami kurang cendekia ataupun kurang berpengalaman. Ya, hidup ini memang berat justru karena ketidakberatan itu sendiri.

3. Kami masih punya waktu luang kok untuk melakukan hobi ataupun kesukaan kami...
Kami bisa nonton movie. Kami bisa pergi main scrabble. Kami bisa ambil diploma di sekolah lain. Kami bisa ambil CFA. Kami bisa pergi kerja part time. Kami bisa menulis blog ini. Kami bisa begini dan begitu... (macam-macam lah) tergantung siapa yang disebut sebagai kami. Ya mungkin faktornya karena kebingungan kami jua untuk memulai apa yang harus kami kerjakan, makanya kami berbuat yang tidak-tidak di luar yang seharusnya itu.

4. Kami masih dicap dan dinilai 'pintar' oleh pihak luar...
Ya sebagai embel-embel S3, dilabeli pintar adalah sebuah konsekuensi. Meskipun seiring dengan waktu kami menyadari bahwa kami mulai kehilangan kepintaran kami itu. Sebenarnya bukan menjadi tidak pintar, tapi kepintaran kami itu biasanya jadi terlalu terfokus pada hal yang terlalu detail yang (biasanya) tidak berguna secara general. Menjadi guru di luaran mungkin sebuah alternatif untuk membuat otak tetap bisa bekerja maksimal.

Coba saja bayangkan.

Pekerjaan santai, gaji lumayan, punya waktu luang, dikira pintar.

Ya walaupun jika ditilik lebih dalam, segala advantage itu terasa fana. Ya paling tidak ada sedikit hal yang masih bisa dibanggakan.

Semoga.

the motivation to be a PhD..

One friend of mine told me that he wanted to become a PhD..

He asked me many things included the registration procedure, how to choose the topic and supervisor, etc etc..
Okay. then I answered him honestly, I told him all that I know, until he felt that it was enough.

While I was answering him.. it reminded me back to myself when I want to apply the PhD.. I reviewed back into my motivation.. my curiousity.. my thought.. before I applied here.. and after I got accepted here..

Some people think that become a PhD is very good!! They just think that it's a worthy thing: gettin degree, no need to pay a single cent, but get paid at the same time, what you need to do is just do a "little" lab work, "attend some courses like the undergrad life", and "get the good score". Well.. so? seems like PhD is a veryy nice offer.

So.. after he finished his questions, it was time for me to ask some questions back.
Just wanted to know what inside his mind, what was his actual motivation.
And the questions were....
1. Do you "really" prepare to do a research for four years?
2. Answer truthfully, do you just chase the "stipend" or not?

-end-

Why Going Conference is so Difficult?

Sometimes I wonder... when we, as a PhD, go to conference/symposium, doesn't it mean that we are representing our school in the international forum? And I'm quite upset for the troubles my school has made... though actually they are in the beginning are the one who "recommend" me to join.

1. They don't put proper procedures on what the documents need to be prepared. So they just ask whatever they think they want.
Academic records (dunno what it is for), conference abstract or topic to be presented (okay reasonable), notification that the abstract has been approved (okay, but even the website of the symposium has not been established yet at that time), notification that conference fee has been paid (err...). Airfare ticket... Well, all of these are the requirement for seeking 'approval' for the leave? Doesn't it mean that we need to get approved first before we settle the airfare and conference fee?

2. They want all the documents to be settled 6 weeks before the date of conference and they just inform about this conference 4 weeks before the date. :s

3. They even ask 3 quotations for the airfare to confirm what I chose is the lowest. What?? :s :s

4. Just for the school certification/support for applying VISA, the school admin hasn't settled it until the day I have to go. Fortunately, I have seeked assistance on my own initiative to Graduate Studies Office (GSO). And I need to settle to Korean embassy (which is one hour journey from my place) three times before I got my VISA approved.

5. For the conference to be approved, they need signature from chair and HOD, which I dunno how slow they would get it?

6. They sent some e-mail even to my undergrad e-mail which is already inactive and never let me know before I ask, "Is there any update so far?"

7. And finally, they need to wait for the 'proper' TA award certificate before all the leave can be processed.

* * *

Well don't blame me if I get soo jealous when I gather with my friends from other school and they are so cheerful...

" I don't know got such complicated procedures. Our admin school just ask us some documents, then they help us to settle the VISA, conference, and also the airfare. And that's it. "

Well, sometimes life is unfair... (-__-)

Why?

Found a nice article on the most common reasons for taking the PhD. The link is http://www.nigels.com/jokes/phd1.pdf. Hmm.. I should have opened this link way before I joined the PhD. Okay, so why I was taking this PhD thing. Let see

which of these reasons are applied to me.

1. I have a diagnosable mental illness: Dunno.. I never go for mental illness check-up. Perhaps I should. Many friends told me that I am fierce (because indeed I am). Some others told that I am childish (well, growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional [Handarmin, 2010], right?).

2. I can't get a job: Hell, true. I was called for P&G interview, Schlumberger, BCA, BP, Badak, some others that I did not remember. None of them were successful.

3. I can't face the real world: Maybe, I never really 'face' the 'real' world. However, I didn't think this is the reason. I was ready and keen to go to the real world at that time.

4. I think it would be cool to have 'Dr' before my name on my credit card: Nope. Even, I shall use 'Mr' on my future credit card or airplane ticket after I get this silly 'Dr' thing.

5. I seek to further my knowledge and contribute to the advancement of science in this, my choosen field: Come on! Don't make me laugh.

6. I'm too ugly to be a model or an actor or a prostitute: True. Even that Korean prof which I hate the most is more handsome than me. A friend of mine wants to marry a Caucasian so that their child will be eligible to become an artist, like Cinta Laura or Nadine Chandradinata.

7. I am impressed by the example set by my television role model, and wish to follow in his/her/its footsteps: What the hell are you thinking? I was not subscribing Nat Geo or History Channel. All that I watched on my TV was gossip show or lame horror movie.

8. Smart chicks are hot: Already found one behind my cubicle.

9. It is a condition of late Uncle Fergus' will that his estate will only go to someone who can withstand severe psychological torture. My cousin is going to join Mossad for their training program: If only I had a damn rich and insane Uncle like that.

10. "PhD" I was just looking to put my application for the lab tech job, so that I can have a salary and job security and can still wear the funky white coat: I am not that nerd to think that lab coat cool

Well. I think I still have not found my reason, why I was joining. It was interesting quiz though. @contributors: Hey, you should try too. Recommended. For those who are currently considering to join, it is strongly recommended. If you do not agree with most of these statements, well, re-consideration is a must. Btw, they have other quizzes. Probably.. Will take it and let you know the outcome shortly.

~AYS~

sudahduaharigaknaiksepedanih